Random

I like listening to music while I cook. Not that I cook so very often, but when I do, it sounds very good :P

My usual favorites are classics of course. But recently, I stumbled upon some old favorites of ours. And so Savage Garden is the flavor of the month. Nostalgia.. The funny thing is, although I havent really heard these songs for more than a decade, but I found (to my delight) that I was able to sing along those songs. ooh I want you, I dont know if I need you.... :)

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Ksh and I have started a self-help group. There are only two people in the group. We stop each other from losing our sh*t at the kids. I must say it is working pretty well. And we have the added delight of having a new common hobby.

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We are also neck deep in getting things finished for the house. I love crawling through the web to find something for the new place. Ksh likes to see the pinterest stuff I show him and somehow thinks I am going to be able to replicate it. :O

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I want to try my hand at woodwork. Like work with really professional tools. I want to become a furniture maker.

Birthday rants

Saw a parrot in flight today. It kind of looked like a swift while flying, a very pretty green swift. magnificent 

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"We are, each of us, a product of the stories we tell ourselves" - Derren Brown, Happy

I came across this book by chance. Bought it on a whim and started it in the middle of another one(The Pilgrimage by Coelho. I need more conviction to finish it though). And I have been so surprised. Its a wonderful read. More wisdom than I could handle at one go. So what happens it that I read a passage, marvel it for a while and then realize that I have to re-read it. And marvel it some more. It is a pleasure.

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I also turn 34 today. Thats a big number. And with age, I am surprised to find myself turning more and more "right-wing" and agreeing with people like Jordan Peterson. I am also scared that the world(at least the first / western world and by the virtue of being blind followers - the educated class of my own humble third world country) is inching towards becoming utterly useless. 

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Another bit of wisdom that I garnered is that I have to be more patient. And by Gods grace, my kids have an incredible ability to teach me patience.

Days to remember

Memories are fickle. They form and then fade, sometimes get distorted and tend to reshape themselves in a simpler manner loosing some of their flavor along the way and picking some false ones with time. Usually it doesn't matter much as long as its a happy memory. But sometimes you want to remember times exactly as they play out. These are such times. The other day K and I realized that although we are rushed all the time, these may be our halcyon days. No major worries, kids in the sweet age where they don't have acad pressure yet.

So apart from the others, here are some silly things I really want to remember:

- Little V learning to speak. His vocabulary expands every minute. Current favorites - more, big, eat, bus, truck, baby and of course NO

- T turning into a little boy from being my baby and so eager to grow up. He is obsessed with farts and keeps a daily count. Also, he takes pleasure in announcing whenever there is a count++ event

- Their favorite "hide and seek" games. V calls it the game of "paaiise". I kind of feel sorry for the family living in the flat below us.

- The way V asks me to play with him the moment he realizes that I am getting ready for work. 

- Night time story sessions. I suspect K enjoys them more than the kids.

I know that soon the kids will have friends of their own, they might not want to play with us anymore. But till that time comes...

For us

This year we had a long long new year's party. The kind you never want to end. But it has to so that there are justifiable reasons to have more parties. And so this one is coming to an end. 

It was one to remember :)

So here is to a very happy and successful year full of joys (big and small), and laughter and genuine smiles. May God bless us with good health and happy times. And faith.

Cheers

Tis the season...

Picnics are fun. Running around, gathering wild lemons, digging, collecting stones, and me – eating all the time. But as it happens, when we have a good time, we tend to make a mess. In fact, I believe it is not possible to be organized and have fun at the same time. Just incomprehensible. So inevitably, at the end, when it is time to leave, we have to clean up. Everything goes back to its place, toys back, garbage in the bin, mats folded & hats back on heads. Everything is organized just to be scattered again.

It’s the same (kind of) with end of the year. Come December and somehow I feel compelled to sort and wrap up everything. Just to be taken out and scattered in the coming year. And had fun with. You know, having fun requires one to make a mess.

Family is here. And it feels every bit like I supposed it would. Noisy bliss I call it. And it’s the best kind of bliss.

Touchwood.

My Precious

The other day, little T found two ball bearings that in the school play-ground. That day when I went to pick him up from school, he was so visibly excited to see me. He said (perfectly mimicking my tone I must add), “Mommy, I have a surprise for you.”

Then he added, “I found two beautiful today. So I got them for your necklace.” J

Those little shiny ball bearings are the best gifts I have ever received.

Proud mommy moment. 

A garden runs wild

So we made a short weekend navratri trip to Ahmedabad. Awesome weather. Great atmosphere.
We managed to tick all the entries from our must-do list and then some.

One of the things I never had imagined I would do was to pluck a ripe "mousambi" and eat it right there by the tree. Yup.

It was amazing.

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"Prance" almost made into the list

My favorite words of the week -

- Continuum 

- Dulcet

- Tread

- Preen

Dream Diary

Thanks to my younger one, our sleep has become less and intermittent. 

For me bad sleep brings on weird dreams. Or may be its just that I remember them more. 

Anyways, so yesterday(night?) my dream was setup in a pre-apocalypse kind of setup. The terrain was rocky and mountainous with rickety spiraling, iron stairs with broken steps. And I vaguely recall people going about their day while being scared all the time.

Anyway, so the dream somehow got me running in a building. So what did I do, I picked up a mattress(yes a full sized one) and used it as some kind of a pole (mattress ?) vault to quickly cover the distance. 

It was awesome. :)

Quarter to three

Yup. Quarter to three in the afternoon - thats my most favorite time of the day. Specially on days when it has rained in the morning, but got miraculously clear afterwards.

The sun is at that perfect angle to light up the trees and leaves so that they seems greener, the sky is at its bluest, good lunch makes people happier and sleepier and a good cup of tea picks them right up.

Enough time has passed since the morning so that you can feel accomplished by all that you did that day, yet you are left with enough daylight hours to finish anything left to do.

Yes, quarter to three is the best time of the day. Today.

Confessions

Despite my best efforts to stay away, last year I was finally caught up in the GOT net. So much so that I seriously cannot wait till the next season begins. It is annoying.
Now, there are a few guesses that I have, and I want to see if they come true. Not noting them down would make me forget and also, I wouldnt have the pleasure of shouting "I KNEW it" to hapless people around me.
So here are my guesses:

1. "the dragon has three heads" would refer to the Lannister trio
2. Daenerys wont get the iron throne. Not for long anyway.
3. The night king would turn out to be a Stark.
4. Bran would plant the dragonglass at fist of the fist men that Sam and Jon found and used to survive.
5. Jorah with the greyscale would be immune to white walkers/undead army.
6. Cersei would still have some wildfire left under kings landing which would be used to kill the walkers. Eventually.
7. Arya would meet Bran before they get to winterfell. If they do.
8. Euron would die this season.

Eight years

It seems like we were kids just yesterday.
Yes, we were kids together.
Now we have kids together.
And yesterday seems so far away.

I know its tomorrow that matters more
So this is for many more joyful tomorrows

normal life is an oxymoron

The act of living, by its very definition, is to navigate the numerous turns and bends, take frequent snack breaks and occasional naps and to arrive at a destination which is the least important part of the journey.

The adventure being that one can never be sure that they are about to reach the destination until they do (and sometimes not even then :O)

Its the journey that matters. A journey which should not be made in a hurry at all. Why would one want to arrive before their time? 

So take time and smell the roses. Enjoy the bumps and the occasional potholes. 

Refuse to be carried by others, walk by yourself. Decide your own course, find a good partner whose company you would enjoy on this road. And above all, enjoy the journey.

On walking

The reason I don’t post much these days is that because out of my old habit of keeping a journal, I love writing about the day at the end of the day. Writing for me is a kind of reminiscing about the day. In a way, it is a form of time travel back to the day past where I cant change anything. But yes, it helps me make meaning out of the happenings. It’s like living the day again, enjoying the conversations one more time. Only this time in my head.

But now the definition of my “day” stretches itself to the end of socially acceptable waking hours and occasionally spills beyond midnight. By that time I am too exhausted/ zombified to walk to the bed, let alone turn on the laptop and write something. (yeah I don’t like writing on ipad or my phone. Both devices very easy to waste time on but very difficult to get anything productive done)

Anyways, so most of my reminiscing now happens during the “walk”. The half hour window I have been sanctioned after we are done with everybody’s dinner. K graciously stays home with the kids while I don up my walking shoes, gear up with some music and go for a stroll. That is the part of my day when it is ok for me to not be attentive about the surroundings (not many cars on road at night and the colony is pretty safe) and daydream.

So now my blogging /journaling/ walking has all merged into one. Its just not recorded anymore.

Throwback thursday

Let the rain come down 
   and wash away my fears
let it fill my soul 
   and drown my fears
let it shatter the walls 
   for a new Sun
A new day has come

 - Aldo Nova and Stephen Moccio, from Celine Dion's song - A new day has come

Music to the rescue

"Summer is here."

The Game of Thorns is full on in Gurgaon this year. Gusts of dust (alliteration much ??) greet us as soon as we step outside.

Anyways, so today while driving back to work I was kind of aware of the heat outside. But then this song came on radio - "Rim jhim gire sawan..."

Lovely song. And it reminded that the heat is here for a reason. It paves the way for monsoon. And then I didnt feel the heat anymore.

The country of the pointed firs

I firmly believe that one should travel as far and wide as possible, see and experience different cultures, people, enjoy their food, walk their streets, view their views, feel their weather, climb their hills. And it might just make one more grounded and broad minded. 

Now although I love to travel, lately our sojourns have become more of a luxury snooty(!!) vacation kind. We hardly meet up and interact with the locals. Kids are kept away from heat and dust and any kind of discomfort. Phew.. a few more years till they are grown up enough.

Till then, I plan to travel by the way of books. Reading always brings me joy. Now and then I pick up a book which is so delicious (for lack of a better word) that I want to gobble it all up in one go. And then ask for a second serving. 

But sometimes, I come across the rare gems which are to be savored slowly. Each bite enjoyable on its own. Pausing between pages, living it. One such gem is The country of the Pointed Firs. The book effortlessly took me to the quaint coastal village. Such beautiful character defining that I felt I have known them for ages. The book feels like a lazy summer afternoon after having beautiful lunch. Not much happening, nothing important to do. Just being content with the present.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who feels the need to slow down a bit. I know I am going to go back to it again and again. Just to induce some calmness. And to learn to pause.

Rant 2 of the day

A couple of hours and two bars of dark chocolate later my mood has perked up somewhat.
Well this and Ksh. Its amazing what a big difference words can make. Just loving and supportive words.
Gosh :)
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Little Tanmay is about to start proper school on Monday. It is both exciting and scary. For me I mean. Tanmay is all happy to go to "the school with the big playground". Its me who is jittery. I wonder if we ever stop being scared for our kids.
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I am going to be better. Become more knowledgeable and improve my skills. I just have to figure out where and in which field I want to excel. hmmm... Does a skill which doesnt really pay, count?

Damn

There are days when the smallest tiniest troubles make me question my life choices.
Today is one of those wretched days.

And no, nothing is wrong per se. But if I think about it, so much is. What am I doing with my life? What use is all the money if the one thing my kids need is me?

Damn

What if stories

The other day i just got thinking how different would all my favorite fiction stories would be if they are forced to incorporate basic technologies in their stories. No secret would remain unearthed for a decade, no person would be able to vanish "without a trace", people would not be forced to travel across geographies to meet/contact their long lost loves and relations. Even the magical world of Harry Potter ( !! ) would lose some if its charm if Voldemort had a nuclear bomb. 

I guess it is difficult to write and compose a stories set in the modern world. Is that why so many of the fiction we see now is based on emotions and relationships ?