Say Butter

I managed to finish "butter" a while ago. It was a difficult read in many ways. One - it had been quite a while since I had actually read something serious and hard hitting without any hint of humor. Second, the story itself is so wonderfully twisted. Its one of those book where characters are written realistically, not in a clean cut way with clear motives, wants and preferences. Her people are muddy, they get confused, they forget, they lie, hide things and occasionally admit their weaknesses to themselves and others, even when they don't want to. 

I loved the book. Also, I was wrong when i said the book was devoid of any humor. The humor lies in the title itself. 

So, what reminded me of Butter today is a scene where the protagonist(ish) accepts that she has no control over the perceptions of her friends about her other friends (does this sentence make sense?). And she gives up, she allows herself to be removed from the scene when she wants to. I am sure I felt a pang of jealousy when I read that. Even if I go away, I cannot stop worrying. 

Of trees and lemongrass

A quote I came across a while ago:

Sometimes, if you’re lucky, there will be a tree outside your bedroom window. It is very important to romanticize this tree as much as possible.

Oh dear God, how this quote resonated with me. The Ashoka tree outside my window was one of my closest friends in high school. I felt comfortable sharing my worries about the board exams with it. And I knew it understood because it bloomed right around the exams, like wishing me good luck. I miss that tree.

I am sure the trees outside my window now are undoubtedly also equally handsome and good looking. But I am not able to relate to them as readily as I could back then. The same is also true with people. It used to be so easy to make friends with people you saw everyday. Some of those friendships are even alive today. But now, it is becoming harder and harder to really open up to new people. Maybe I am getting old and set in my ways. Maybe the world is changing and everyone is becoming warier, less inclined to connect to real people. Maybe we are getting our need for human connections fulfilled somewhere else- digitally. So obviously, it is not going so well for humanity. 

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The nest has been reused by another bird couple, they are a different species. I couldn't really identify it. But it is some kind of weaver bird. They took out blades of our lemongrass and tore bamboo leaves into thin string like pieces.. used them to weave a cave like dwelling. In the morning you can hear the hatchlings shouting.. :)

Parenting is a boiled egg

One thing that is becoming painstakingly clearer with every passing day is that as a parent, we have to let our kids make mistakes...at least some. I am picking my battles here.

Being a parent is hard. And mostly annoying as hell. I am dreading their teenage years :|

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There are a couple of pieces I have been meaning to paint for the last few days. I have been putting off starting the project because it looks a bit tricky and I am scared to get it wrong. But then, my vangoghthelife sent me a simple canvas by him. Sure it has his tell-tale strokes, an interesting perspective, and well executed colour scheme... but it is not very technical and yet manages to look so appealing. Well, there must be some genius hidden in it because managed to make me want to pick up the brushes.. I hope this "want" turns into a "done".

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P.S. We have a red vented bulbul nesting in our aparajita vine.

Wishing for -what- will make this better?

There are some emotions you don't readily share with the public. Actually, these are hidden away in some obscure recess of your own psyche, just to emerge when something truly despicable happens. 

Like it happened 3 days ago. An act of cowardice and sheer evil. First reaction (as spectators from far) is anger, then helplessness... followed by hatred. It is such an ugly emotion, and I hope nobody ever has to feel so. 

It reduces a sane human being to a diabolical creature. 

And I feel that in times like these, it is justified. 

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I need a "publish privately" feature on this blog. Maybe that will make me able to rant clearly. 

Cosmic joker

Funny coincidence: every thursday at 5, T and I find ourselves driving towards the music class. On 90% of those days, that fevicol of songs plays on the radio - Light up, light up sketchers. I mean, the song is so bad, so, so bad. And it sticks :(

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Poetry is the salt

I happened to read some verses from rashmirathi today. I have always loved this epic. Of course when I first read it, I was too young and naive to even begin to understand the sheer genius of this creation. So about 15 years ago, when I first saw the entire epic (which is seven parts with several chapters in each) on kavitakosh, I was truly blown away.

So, one of the remnants of the good old era of nice-internet is kavitakosh. As far as I know, its a not-for-profit venture run by volunteers. Please do visit. It hosts so many gems that we do not come across anymore. 

Rashmirathi has been permanently bookmarked on my browser ever since then. Every now and then, I do happen to read a verse or two and it never fails to amaze!

सच है, विपत्ति जब आती है, 

कायर को ही दहलाती है,

शूरमा नहीं विचलित होते,

क्षण एक नहीं धीरज खोते,

विघ्नों को गले लगाते हैं,

काँटों में राह बनाते हैं।

The wind rises

Summer is in full bloom here in Hyd. As if on cue, the amaltaas have flowered right around Ugadi. So its an even more colourful display of beauty around us now. These trees dont believe in modesty I think :p

Even our humble balcony has been painted pink making the morning coffee an affair with beauty.

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The ghiblify trend has openAi's GPUs melting they said. I dont know if Miazaki would be happy or sad at this trend. I for one have no right to complain having tried it myself. 

Flame of the forest

A couple of weeks ago we went on a road trip to Tadoba. If I had to choose two words to describe this road trip, they would be - (1) roads and (2) trip. Just kidding, the words would be (1)where and (2) tiger.

Apart from our usual road trip itinerary (eating loads of junk because calories don't count on the road) we were able to witness something magnificent. - SPRING in the jungle. I was constantly reminded of the poem -"aaye mahant vasant". So many vibrant colors - palash, yellow elder, pink trumpets.. everywhere in the forest. While the boys were busy bouncing around to catch a sight of the beast, I was happy feasting my eyes on these beauties. 

I love libraries

 Overheard between two 4th graders in the school library... and I should add for context, they're both boys - "Did you know Bruno Mars isnt actually from Mars?"

I was there for a reading program. Loved it.

Because I like food

Over the years we have made our peace with the realization that we are a noisy family. There is no doubt or debate about this anymore. Social engagements are planned keeping this fact in mind. Which is also one of the reasons we love outdoors so much... lol

But jokes aside, we talk a lot, and constantly.. and sometimes all at once (yeah I know how that sounds. No, we are not a misbehaved lot. We just have so much to say). So, coming back to the point. This phenomena of talking a lot means that a lot of words are used everyday. Maybe this is why, it is possible to observe "semantic shifts" even within our limited population. The trends are often short lived (upto 6 months). Some of the currently trending ones are:

a) using related nouns as verbs, even when an appropriate verb is available. e.g. I am fooding for I am eating, sleep me for help me sleep.. etc.

b) eliminating intervening vowel sounds from 2 syllable words. e.g. This juice tastes gd for good, I need fd for food. 

(Please note that (a) and (b) can also be combined to form - fd me i.e. food me which in turn means - Give me food)

c) Inserting "the" between multisyllabic words to separate the syllables.. e.g. wa-the-ter for water, re-the-mote for remote, etc.

d) Distinct neologism.. This phenomenon isn't short lived at all. In fact, some words have crossed generations now :)

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My newfound love is for pickled root vegetables. So usually beetroot, carrots and.. radish ! Now the kids hate the smell of pickled radishes, or radishes in general. And I have discovered this is a very effective method of getting myself some quiet time. All I have to do is open a jar of pickles :)

 

Does phony philosophy count as alliteration

 I recently read the following quote from Nietzsche (had to google his name to get the spelling right):

"If you crush a cockroach, you're a hero. if you crush a butterfly, you're a villain. Morals have aesthetic criteria."

To be honest, Nietzsche sounds like an absolute a****le(is this the first expletive on this blog?.. well It is technically an adult now, so this should be okay). because it is pretty obvious that it is not just about aesthetics. It sounds like he wants to attract attention through this pretentious quote just for the sake of it. I would like to see him surrounded by cockroaches.

what kind of name is deepseek?

I sometimes put the coffee grounds in the aparajita plants. It makes them burst into flowers in a couple of days. I dont overdo this because I think it will drive the plant crazy. Just like this time last year, the plant has caught some kind of bug again. It will take at least 3-4 rain showers to clear that up.

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There is too much AI generated content everywhere. 

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IMHO names should actually mean something.

here and now

Greetings on the new year :)

As I age, I have observed changes in my perception of onset of another year. Earlier, it used to be awe, sense of something cosmically big.. the sense of being positively overwhelmed.

Now, it is mostly gratitude... the sense of being immensely thankful to the Universe for letting us survive and thrive during another round around the Sun. 

I understand why people start believing, having faith in God more as they age. It is because we realize that none of this is in our control... nothing. The fact that we are what we are, doing the things we are doing, living the lives we are living.. all of this happened despite of what we did... not because. In the grand scale of design, we are nothing, in consequential. (IMHO being inconsequential is a pretty happy way to live.. but that is another conversation.)

Naturally, one would attribute such good fortune to God and His will. Because otherwise, here will be a scary place and now will be a scary time to live.